Have you ever noticed life is like putting the pieces of the puzzles together? I feel as though I collect pieces and when I’m paying attention, I get the whole picture. Let me give you an example.
If you’ve read anything from this blog, you know that I’m not taking a traditional diet, surgery route for my health. (Oh- I’ve been there done that on both.) Instead, I’m working from the inside out and working on mindful eating, being present and healing as I go. I believe my weight and addiction are here for my lessons in life. That being said, I find it really hard to be in conversations with people who are all about weight, diets, restrictions and what the scale says. Today I realized it’s as if I’m present and listening to something that goes against my beliefs and it’s HARD to be with it.
Today I started a coaching call with a group of powerful men and women. We are all playing a “game” for five weeks and today we shared what our game is and how we know if we achieved our goals or “won the game” at the end of the five weeks. Wouldn’t you know. All the other players have a part of their game about weight loss. Really? WTF. I kid you not. At the end of the call I had myself muted because I was crying. I was thinking “I’m so out of here.” “I can’t do this.” “Is this one of those times where I have more integrity to myself if I leave the game?” I told myself I’d think on it and I opened up for guidance. Guidance was delivered in a swift and unexpected manner.
Not 30 minutes later I was reading Facebook and saw a post about not caring because no one else does. Then there were commiserating posts of agreement. In my head I said “we draw our experiences to us” and I went on to make my bed. As I was doing that chore, it came again “we draw our experiences to us”. Nooooooooooooo really? Come on! I felt like a kid that wanted to kick the dirt because it was loud and clear.
I’ve drawn this experience of being in a group with these great folks for a reason. I can’t say that I’m looking forward to that because my body had a pretty tough reaction this morning. Instead, I’ll say I’m looking forward to finding ease around this. We live in a society that is super focused on these things which trigger me. Since I’ve drawn this to myself, there is a reason. Let’s find out what it is! I just realized that I thought I had all the pictures to the puzzle but I don’t. I had enough pieces to see THIS part of the picture. I’m open to finding the other pieces and broadening my picture.